Can a women only either be a "Villain" or a "Victim" ?
The Meghan Markle sparkle is gone, according to media opinion, but what comes forward? Feminism. Feminism comes forward. I will say it loud and clear. I like Meghan Markle. I think she’s independent and I believe she is not the villain or victim, but a strong female who knows what she wants. In the villain and victim dilemma, feminism doesn’t exist. When she wears designer, she’s wasting tax payers money. When she wears Zara, she looks ‘cheap’. She is a modern women married into a family that is all rules and no room for female indifference. Tradition is big in the royal family, and feminism lets be honest is not one of them. "Villainizing"a strong women to be “too needy” and “not much” is not new in society; the only difference here is the royal family. If Beyonce walks into a room full of males, comes prepared for the meeting, does all the work and “owns” the meeting, she is strong, independent and a success. If Meghan Markle does that, she is “too much”, pushy, and too involved. What is the difference? Can it be down to the work they had both done. Admittedly Beyonce has been in the music business for more then twenty years, and has worked hard to gain her success and power. Do we reject Meghan Markle because we feel as if she doesn’t deserve this role due to not paying her dues? Meghan Markle is ambitious and hard working, which is charming to some at first, yet is now being seen as a problem. If we want answers we can all just take a look at Princes Diane. She once said in the Royal Family you either sink or swim because you don’t have time for any other choices. She swam, but is there another option? Meghan Markle is not sinking or swimming, but simply moving on while being herself and keeping it all together. It’s 2020, can Meghan Markle be ambitious and not be a Villain or a Victim? If Meghan Markle can be silenced with the privilege she has, what are our odds? When an institution is trying to “bend” you into place as a member of the Royal Family, can you bend while still being yourself and bring forth what you need and want? Can two different women exist in a family dynamic what only services the ones view? Kate Middleton, Williams wife will most likely be Queen, and undoubtedly she takes her role seriously and services the common wealth incredibly. Can Meghan only be accepted if she mirror’s Kate? it is a double standard because William doesn’t mirror Harry? Harry is completely different then William. He is beloved, but his responsibilities are different. Is it because he is a born Royal or is it because he is a man and we need all women to be and to follow one path. Pretty, well put together, always smiling, but not ambitious. The blame game began when Meghan Markle and Harry left the Royal Family. The blame completely fell on the woman lets be honest. Harry has been called "pussy wiped", manipulated, forced and of course Meghan was pulling the strings all the way out. Can I woman do something her way without backlash? What if we just view this Megixt as any other family-sister in laws may not get along, couples move away from there families, and families disagree. Why is it such a big deal? Is it the Royal rules or the new age female working role? Women are always going to be compared, but to go as far as to labelling one a ‘free loader’ and the other incredibly devoted is attacking. Could it seemly be because of her past, her career before or even because she was previously divorced? Could it even be a race issue?
Did she free Harry or steal him away from the people? Does it only have to be one of those options? Can’t it be that a young couple decided they didn’t want this life anymore,that they wanted privacy, family and independence? Can’t an ambitious woman be married with a child and still have a personal working relationship.
No one can disagree with the facts that Harry and Meghan made mistakes in the public eye. They talk about environmental change and yet take private planes everywhere. Mistakes happened like within all our families. Can a strong ambitious women be with one of the most influential man in the world without being labeled as over rated and over done if she tries to make her own way and become her own person. Can’t a woman in 2020 be in a strong marriage and still have her own identity, or will it always be a good girl or a difficult girl? When did good mean silent, non ambitious and uninvolved and difficult mean the opposite. Yet a men is desirable and even labelled a “better catch” if they work, are involved, take a stand, are always involved and have a “back done”. Does this double standard only come to light when the female is in the spotlight? When I think about it, really think about it, I have always had women or misogynist males who believe I’m doing too much, should stay in my own “lane” or the classic, your ‘just’ a woman.
As I get older it only becomes more clear. To others you will always be either a villain or a victim, but remember to you, you can be whatever you want to be.
Meghan Markle, even though criticized has done it, she has left the Royal family. No one knows if its indefinitely, but for right now it's done. They as a couple have decided to live a different life. They have put other priorities first. Love it or hate it.
Ironically as I wrote this I was watching a documentary in which a very respected lawyer addresses the fear men have of women. It's links go back to the time where strong women were believed to have powers,also known as witches. He explains "men have also feared women. Feared that they will be able to fully control them. This is why we began vilifying them". Can this still be? Does society vilify strong women because of fear that they will become the strongest of us all? If this is true and if this was to happen, why fear it? If women come to light and are these strong beings that can be independent and self sufficient do men fear it because they are worried about being irrelevant? A woman can have a baby on her own, can buy a home alone, get an education alone and live beyond survival. Let's embrace it now because the traditional relationship with males and females is shifting. Embrace it or get out of the way because this woman is coming through and she may not need you.
K